User:PhineasCrank/notepad

It wouldn't suprise me to find anyone stealing these bits. In fact, I almost encourage it. But, if you plan to use something, please let me know.

Possible Inventions

• Lightning Gun
• Aether Ship
• Fefferberry Scones
• Umlaut Tea
• Doctor Crank's Interlinear Escape and Vent Shaft (Ist das verboten?)
• Doctor Crank's Highly Adjustable Animal and Mythical Beast Call
• Ghoulwood Viola
• Perpetual Pocketwatch w/ alarm
• The Takemitsu Journal
• Kagerō Diary
• Tales of Toyokage

Flora and Fauna

• Honey Lotus
• pacyosaurus
• pygmy parasitic vampire swallow
• dragonwort
• goblinwort tree

People and Places

• River Naught
• Ebony Academy
• University of Havernot, Department of Occult Science
• Albertus Crank
• Plintz
• Maximilian Gustavus Grande

Events

• Cantalope Crisis
• Kumquat Crisis

--Doctor Phineas Crank 06:36, 13 Sep 2004 (EDT)

Occult Lore

• Ghost Magic
• The Grim Booke
• Grimporke Grimoire:
  • History: The name of the Grimporke Grimoire takes its name from the bad ham which is believed to have inspired it. Said ham having laid about after a great feast and rolled in both spilt Ball Lightning Liqueur and soured Fefferberry juice before being ingested by the unctious author, one Ibaan Malmiz. Ser Malmiz, also known as the Drunken Prophet, was quite infamous in his foolhardy explorations of both occult lore and dubious culinary "delights".

In any case, Ser Malmiz claimed on more than one occasion to have plumbed the secret depths of knowlege not only of the Sarfelogian Mountains but also the ritual secrets of the ancient Looliers. He spent a great amount of time recording his various discoveries as a virtual hermit on the Wasted Plains of Maliatt, or "Blood" in their native tounge, far from the mountains for which he is known. It is said that he was shunned by the few natives of that land because he was quite visibly and material haunted by a rather large shining spirit that took a shape not unlike that of a great, pink Aelfant. Indeed, shortly after announcing, via postal mail, to a former collegue that he had completed his unholy work, he was seen by a local tribesman being carried off at great speed by that self-same spirit and he has not been heard from since! In his terrible memoir, he claimed to have seen fabulous Sayaziha, or City of Spheres, and to have found beneath the ruins of a certain nameless desert town the shocking annals and secrets of a race older than mankind. He was rumored to be a former member of the Brothers of the Lantern, but, if he was, he was only an indifferent Brother, and was no doubt expelled for worshipping the unknown entities whom he called Nyogurt and Leemonje'lo. In later years (-220 EC ?), this Fefferberry defiled text was translated into olkuull by the infamous occult scholar, Maximilian Thaddeus Dossleham. A very limited number of these translations were circulated, but one slightly damaged copy managed to eventually (circa -100 EC) find it's way to the hands of Agwa Reeum on his island home, where he translated it yet again into untch, which has long been favored by scholars of occult lore as a "lingua franca". This edition was quite widely reprinted, though it was almost successfully repressed by the Brotherhood. It is believed that at least one copy of this edition is in the library of the Karcist League, though, of course, none of the League members have been available for comment. Another, apparently incomplete copy, was known to be in possesion of Hirum Paul Macklefoot during his tenure at the University of Havernot as Dean of the Department of Occult Science. He translated that copy into our own sublime language, intending to use it as a text book for his "First, Do No Harm" class for advanced students of occultology. Unfortunately, he dissapeared under somewhat mysterious circumstances while on holiday in the Sarfelogian Mountains. His original copy, from which he was working, was with him when he departed for parts unknown and we are left with his quite interesting, but definately incomplete, translation. This translation is still in the archives of the University, along with what few notes Professor Macklefoot left behind. This version of the text is what most occult scholars know today and has been widely redistributed under several printers and printings. Though, it is still rumored that significant portions have been left out of the publicly available editions. Another copy, apparently also translated from the Reeum copy was translated and resides in the Bute University, though it is unknown how much of that edition is missing. In fact, that edition itself has not been seen in some time and may have gotten lost in the "clocktower incident".http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/9879/nechist.htm

Good Words That Mean Nothing, Yet

• citylendinds
• cipang
• cultipler
• catectoric
• danupsycled
• dynary
• douset
• daerow
• eolocaller
• eckling
• gleets (actually, that one does mean something...)