Ghyll talk:Kan d'Aire
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I enjoyed this one. Am a bit concerned about some of the "flow" - if she's been burnt, and is dead, then she HAS died, and the family HAS gone away. Yet, your first paragraph talks as if she hasn't died. --Morbus Iff 09:25, 5 Aug 2005 (EDT)
- I modified the flow so it's all written in the correct tense and everyone who should be dead, is. Thank you. --Trousle Undrhil 23:48, 7 Aug 2005 (EDT)
- Well, she did already die and then turn out to be okay once, maybe leaving her in the present tense is the correct thing to do in this case. --Dfaran L'Eniarc 02:20, 8 Aug 2005 (EDT)
- No, she is definitely dead now. She was burned so as to prevent her from ceasing to be dead again. :) --Trousle Undrhil 13:38, 8 Aug 2005 (EDT)
