Ghyll:Snotgun

dib. Now I'm going to die of this terrible sinus infection. Good night. --Doctor Phineas Crank 00:05, 19 Feb 2005 (EST)

An insidious invention of that theoalchemical mastermind Harv Gretborn, the snotgun is the finest example of applied biological warfare known to Ghyll. As implied by the name, the snotgun fires mucous missles of incredible infectiousness. Very similar to the ingenious repeating musket recently seen in the hills surrounding the Sarfelogian Mountains, the snotgun fires its slimy slug, encased in a crunchy shell, with great velocity. The impact, though stinging, is generally only enough to rupture the casing which then exposes the target to gruesome goober contained therein. And there lies the genius of the weapon! For what soldier of any stripe can resist sticking their finger in something alien and gooey! Once the poor front-line grunt has fallen for the lure, the the baneful bullet goes to work.

The really nasty thing about the snotgun is not the slimy slug itself, but the deadly diseases carried in the runny round. These are gathered by various low-wage workers in assorted zoological venues. Freshly made mucous is harvested from many different animals, including, but not limited to Aelfants, Burnflies, Dwarf Tree Aelfants, Eye Suckers, Phaelros, Pyxies, and Tree Eels. Of course, some of the potent projectiles are manufactured from the mucous drippings of the terrible Ebony-Headed Marrow-Sucker and, while few things are worse than a case of Burnfly Blight or The Pyxie Pukes, neither of these compare with Zygotic Dermitosis which is the result.

Most of the concoctions in these sickly slugs are very high military secrets, of course, and their effects are learned only after they have been used in battle. One such mysterious malady has been described by a doctor attached to the Tarkherk Corps in Doctoring Disease for Dimwitts:

"We once came across a strange new illness while fighting in the Xurient. We were quite surprised, of course, when we found ourselves assaulted with snotguns, seemingly to no effect. The inscrutible Xurientals simply fired, turned and ran. We chased them as far as we could, but they dissappeared into the local countryside. The men, in celebration...

Of course, the snotgun's inventor, Harv Gretborn, had hoped that such a contemptible creation would make war so horrific that Ghyllians would be obliged to cease making it upon each other.

Citations:Harv Gretborn, Theoalchemy, Zygotic Dermitosis