Ghyll:Undivaggen

Undivaggen is the ancestral home of the aristocratic Wallinger family, situated in the village of Marsh Gibbon. The long-abandoned core of the building, according to archaeological investigations, dates back to at least -500 EC, although the Wallingers do not appear in the Marsh Gibbon records as being in possession of it until at least a century later. The meaning of the name is not known, although scholarly conjecture is not lacking (as can be seen below).

The architectural style of the building is unique. In addition to the core, which formerly comprised about twelve rooms, the building consists of three wings or tentacles, usually called the Northeast, the Northwest, and the South wings based on the point at which they attach to the core. Each wing, however, has developed by adding new rooms in a clockwise spiral chain; as a result, the fifteenth room of the Northeast wing, counting from the core (to pick an example at random), actually stands in a southerly direction from the core. As of 0 EC, there were 353 rooms in the Northeast wing, 422 rooms in the Northwest wing, and only 294 (comparatively large) rooms in the South wing.

The family now uses only the outermost twenty or so rooms in the South wing, which provide more than sufficient facilities for the extended family during the annual Wallinger/Vallinger/Vallian/Yekhoto reunions. These rooms were lovingly restored, after a long period of neglect, by Bavarian Creame and her younger sisters, Jack Juffers and Madam Calvian of Folktown.

The remaining rooms, which are amazing examplars of the various periods of interior design and decoration in Ghyll history and prehistory, have been long out of use, of course, due to the difficulties of getting access to them, since each room is reachable only from its outward neighbor. Indeed, the main reason for building new rooms over the centuries is that various Wallingers have found it cheaper and simpler to add rooms than to provide the access required to perform necessary upkeep on older rooms. In addition, the open ground between the wings has become a giant compost heap due to the habits of earlier and less civilized Wallingers of tossing their garbage out the windows. The rooms themselves have been spared the depredations of vermin, both sentient and not, due to a judicious application of theoalchemy.

A major source of income for the Wallingers in these degenerate days is the user fees collected from tourist parties who wish to explore the outer (or in the case of the highly motivated, the inner) windings of Undivaggen, as well as the sale of bottled water, G.O.R.P., walking sticks, booby-trap detectors, and other useful materiel to such above-ground spelunkers. A short connective passage that provides access from the Northeast to the South wing, about twenty-five rooms inward, has made essentially the whole of the uninhabited parts of Undivaggen accessible to visitors. It is most certainly a sight not to be missed for those traveling to the capital city of Ghyll.

Citations: Bavarian Creame, Madam Calvian, Vemish.

--John Cowan 13:41, 15 Mar 2005 (EST)

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The name of Undivaggen is indeed a curious one, especially if one remembers that the house didn't originally belong to the Wallingers. I have recently come to the conclusion, after deciphering some ancient manuscripts at the Bureau for Forgotten Knowledge, that the place was built by a tribe of vicious and hitherto unknown pygmies. The name derives from their proto-language, and consists of the phrase "Undig", which translates as "He Who Belongs Beneath a Huge Pile of Splak", and "Vaggenn" which means "We Really Need a Bigger Bedroom". My theory states that the mansion was built after the wife of the chief pygmy wanted to impress the neighbors, and that the whole thing kinda got out of control after that. Nobody knows how the tribe perished, and I myself am of the belief that they're still living in there somewhere, waiting to be discovered by some unfortunate explorers. --Lankin the Mad Mage 20:20, 2 May 2005 (EDT)

I believe, my fellow scholar, that your translation of "Vaggenn" is somewhat misinformed, shall I say? The word to which you are referring, which means "We Really Need a Bigger Bedroom" is "Vaggemm". I can see how the two words can get confused since they are of similar spelling. From my studies, "Vaggenn" is always translated as "One Who Owns the Splak". Thus, Undivaggen would roughly translate to "He Who Belongs Beneath a Huge Pile of His Own Splak". Again, that's a rough translation. I'm sure the ancient Pygmies had a more appropriate meaning for it. Possibly "Where is the toilet again?" or "How the Splak are you?" It's all up to the individual doing the translating, I'm afraid. --Trousle Undrhil 23:20, 2 May 2005 (EDT)

Though you might be correct in pointing out that I have confused the two words, I am most grieved to state that your own translation of the word "Vagenn" is quite erroneous. Perhaps even pathetically wrong, as anyone can see that the relevant pictogram is clearly holding a fish and not a rock. It would therefore not mean "His Own Splak", but "His Own Richness of Being", which I would believe implies the wealth the dwelling itself symbolized to the pygmies. One can therefore assume that they lived beneath it, since the name would then translate as "He Who Lives Beneath His Own OBcene Amount Of Wealth." Perhaps future explorers should try finding caves beneath the floors in the central building? --Lankin the Mad Mage 17:40, 3 May 2005 (EDT)

Well, of course "Vagenn" means "His Own Richness of Being". I was speaking of "Vaggenn". Again, I can understand the misunderstanding. You are, of course, correct about the pictogram. I can concede that this is probably a mistranslation but only by complete examination of the source material can anyone be certain. --Trousle Undrhil 00:05, 4 May 2005 (EDT)

Damn my lack of spelling, for I must now concede that you have bested me in the scholarly arts my good sir. I bow down to your superior research. --Lankin the Mad Mage 08:47, 4 May 2005 (EDT)

I beg to differ, my fine if somewhat befuddled colleagues. First and foremost, if one is to understand the true meaning of "Undivaggen" one must not forget its origin: "Undivaggen" is derived from an application of Modern Ghyllian upon the Early Irregular Ghyllian that was prevalent amongst scholars prior to as recently as circa -60 EC. Of course misconceptions from misspellings will be (and are) abundant in our times but I, however, have taken this into account. "Undig" whose current meaning is incontestably "He Who Belongs Beneath a Huge Pile of Splak" is also a modern transliteration of the more ancient and less common "Uhtig" which means "They Who Take Home Huge Piles of Splak"; it is very important in archaeolinguistic studies to take into account the synonyms of pre-modern terms! As to the problem of "vaggenn," "vagenn," and "vaggemm," this is all moot as it is only modern squabbling - the pictograph, as translated in Way Early Inconcise Ghyllian stemming from some three hundred years ago is: "faghenn" (notice the subtle labiamutation which has occurred over the last three centuries); this term is understood to mean "Disobedient & Slippery Child." Therefore, Undivaggen stems truly from "uhtigfaghenn" which means assuredly "They who Take Home Huge Piles of Splak for their Disobedient & Slippery Child." --Nikos of Ant 19:54, 4 May 2005 (EDT)