Difference between revisions of "Ghyll:Ignatius Maximillian Albertus Crank"
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m (Potting. Of... ***BOGGLES***) |
m (&nd?!) |
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<div style="padding-bottom:0.25em;">The stupendousest night of the season comes afoot as</div> | <div style="padding-bottom:0.25em;">The stupendousest night of the season comes afoot as</div> | ||
<div style="font-size:135%; font-variant:small-caps; padding-bottom:0.25em;">Professor Ignatius Maximillian Albertus Crank</div> | <div style="font-size:135%; font-variant:small-caps; padding-bottom:0.25em;">Professor Ignatius Maximillian Albertus Crank</div> | ||
− | <div style="padding-bottom:0.25em;">provides intellectual conceits to the community, </div> | + | <div style="padding-bottom:0.25em;">provides intellectual conceits to the community, &nd</div> |
− | <div> | + | <div>a Sample of his Hair Wares for your "entertainment"!</div> |
<p>* * *</p> | <p>* * *</p> | ||
<p>Cranee this Monterfest!</p> | <p>Cranee this Monterfest!</p> | ||
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<div>will demonstrate the mysteries of the quayres as he re-enacts his famous</div> | <div>will demonstrate the mysteries of the quayres as he re-enacts his famous</div> | ||
<div><strong>Potting of the Ten Kettles</strong></div> | <div><strong>Potting of the Ten Kettles</strong></div> | ||
− | <div>being as he is a world class | + | <div>being as he is a world class &nd most utterly "excellent" handler of those Stoppers and Steppers.</div> |
<hr /> | <hr /> | ||
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<div style="text-align:center;">So Don't Miss Out:</div> | <div style="text-align:center;">So Don't Miss Out:</div> | ||
<div>Discoverer of Elminster Mire's <strong>talking dead</strong>!</div> | <div>Discoverer of Elminster Mire's <strong>talking dead</strong>!</div> | ||
− | <div>Adventurer, philanthropist, scholar, doctor, horse waxer, entrepreneur, pharmacologist, gut screamer, | + | <div>Adventurer, philanthropist, scholar, doctor, horse waxer, entrepreneur, pharmacologist, gut screamer, &nd theologian!</div> |
<p style="font-variant:small-caps;">Prof. I.M. Albertus Crank</p> | <p style="font-variant:small-caps;">Prof. I.M. Albertus Crank</p> | ||
<div><strong>Will be appearing</strong> for your entertainment</div> | <div><strong>Will be appearing</strong> for your entertainment</div> |
Revision as of 11:28, 6 November 2004
[The following is a transcript of the only known contemporary mention of Professor Ignatius Maximillian Albertus Crank; from an advertisement handed out in a fete programme in roughly -80 EC.]
Roll up, roll up!
* * *
The stupendousest night of the season comes afoot as
Professor Ignatius Maximillian Albertus Crank
provides intellectual conceits to the community, &nd
a Sample of his Hair Wares for your "entertainment"!
* * *
Cranee this Monterfest!
Seven nights minus six only!
For a contrivance of your Quezloos:
"Astonishing" Hair Tonic Never again will your hairy parts be hairyless! Winter is "coming"; don't be caught a fool with your sensitive parts frozen to the surroundings.
Lo! Prof. I.M. Albertus Crank
will demonstrate the mysteries of the quayres as he re-enacts his famous
Potting of the Ten Kettles
being as he is a world class &nd most utterly "excellent" handler of those Stoppers and Steppers.
"Help, for I am trapped in a strange advertisement!"
Will Fessor Crank again flaunt his famous
* multiple aedeaguses *
in front of the crowd? We just do not know!!!
Turn up, find out, be AMAZED!
|
Appearing alongside Professor Crank will be... Jigglier than a pink pachyderm;
Cuddlier than an alluring avian!
The one and only amazing Miss. Hairy Mandibles (MDip, BNCS, COBB, FLap). So Don't Miss Out:
Discoverer of Elminster Mire's talking dead!
Adventurer, philanthropist, scholar, doctor, horse waxer, entrepreneur, pharmacologist, gut screamer, &nd theologian!
Prof. I.M. Albertus Crank Will be appearing for your entertainment
in Cranee, this coming Monterfest!
Next Monterfest Show:
Pantheon of Diseases!
Coming again only to Cranee.
(For bookings, contact the pox office.)
|
Citations: Fijjit_Mejora, Quezloos, @@.
--Sean B. Palmer 10:57, 6 Nov 2004 (EST)