I Had A...

Someone mentioned Planned Parenthood's "I had an abortion" shirts, and as everyone is so wont and quick to do, thus began the lampooning. I don't want to make fun of 'em - I want to help the cause.

First, I'd like to give one of these shirts, free, to everyone who gets an abortion. See, these shirts are all about awareness, and there's no better way to discuss a touchy subject them to start off with a punchy ice breaker: "I had an abortion and all I got was this lousy t-shirt."

Secondly, I'd like another line of shirts to be made reading "I had incredible sex with someone who looked just like you." One of the easiest, pro-active ways to increase awareness about abortions is to, well, have more abortions, thus increasing vital marketing statistics and the amount of free shirts being worn. One way to accomplish this is to increase the amount of rape, and this new line should certainly push the already lustful into pure animalistic fury.